Mikey Boom

10. A Computer!
-seriously, everything is in some way related to the series of tube we call the Internet. Everyone should have the ability to get online from home by now.

9. Video Game Console
- This may just be wishful thinking on my part. Wii, PS3, Xbox360 pick one. Gaming is cool again.

8. A Big Screen TV (must be flat)
- Prices are lower than ever on big screen LCD’s and Plasma TVs.

7. Digital camera
- Do they even make film anymore?

6. A Decent Cell Phone
- Not even Zack Morris has a “Zack Morris” phone anymore.

5. DVD player
-Having a VCR is like owning an 8 Track player.

4. A Netflix Account or a TiVo/DVR
- This is what the cool kids are talking about.

3. An MP3 player
- You need the ability to choose from 3,000 songs at the touch of a button.

2. A Gmail Account
- I’m pretty sure that in a few years Google will rule the world. Get on their good side, get a gmail account…thank me later.

1. A Blog
- A great man once said. “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop to take it in sometimes, you’ll miss it”

10. Al Gore

-You gave us the internet and now you give us global warming? Hey Al, whats’ up with that?!

9. Transformers
-Steven Speilberg is tackling this monster of a movie. Look for a release date around July 07′. P.S. every transformer nerd in the room just wet their pants.

8. O.J. Simpson

- His new book is aptly titled “If I did it” which details how he would have killed his wife and her friend, if he had killed his wife and her friend. The book was recently canceled however, look for his next book entitled “The Juice is loose Bitches”

7. Mel Gibson

- Arrested for drunk driving and inability to make a decent movie. The Lethal Weapon is back. You anti-semetic sand baggin sonabitch!

6. Britney Spears

- Britney Spears single again? No one saw that one coming. “Hey yall I’m single again! I don’t need these panties!”

5. David Hasselhoff

- I don’t know why he’s back either, Just don’t to hassel the hoff.

4. Democrates

- These jackasses are back and ready for some political action.

3. Microsoft

- Office 07, The Zune, the upcoming Windows Vista, Microsoft tightens their grip and Bill Gates pulls up his trousers…yea, higher.

2. Foreign peeps

- Bush wants to create a border wall to keep illegal immigrants out of the U.S. He intends to pay illegal immigrants $2.00 to build it as long as they are on the other side of it at the end.  Borat just want to make sexy time with Pamela Anderson. My fellow foreign people go a lot of attention in 2006.

1. Nintendo

-Back and better than ever. Wiiii are excited.

Top 10 Best Ways to Treat You Lady During the Holidays

10. When she asks how she looks, shrug and say “Could be better.” This will keep her on her toes, and girls love that.

9. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she’s sleeping. If she is say “You better be.” Repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. This will show her you care.

8. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement, and every girl needs some improvement.

7. Introduce her to your friends as “some chick.” Women love those special nicknames.

6. If shes mad at you for not calling her when you say you will promise her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call you’re going to tell her a special surprise. Now she’ll be really excited. Now don’t call.

5. Look her in the eyes and smile…then clock her one. Girls love a spontaneous guy.

4. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. (Or–if she grabs your hand, squeeze hers really really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are)

3. If you’re talking to another girl, make sure shes looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words “F*ck you” and grab the other girls ass. Girls love competition.

2. Remember her birthday but don’t get her anything. Teach her material objects aren’t important. The only thing thats important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.

1. When she gives you a present on Christmas take it and tell her you love it. Then, next time you know she’s coming over on a trash day, leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don’t like this one that much but I think it’s funny.